What If the Hardest Things You’ve Lived Through Are the Keys to Who You’re Meant to Become?

In this raw, courageous, and deeply personal hybrid of memoir and self-help, Ashish Saini takes readers on an unforgettable journey through disability, difference, identity, and dignity—from hospital beds to heartbreak, from rejection to resilience.

Born with a rare facial deformity and later coming to terms with his sexuality in a deeply conservative culture, Ashish spent years confronting shame, social stigma, and self-doubt. What began as a fight to be "normal" transformed into a lifelong path toward self-acceptance and authentic living.

Through honest storytelling and hard-earned wisdom, What If explores questions we all carry:

What if I’m not enough?

What if no one ever accepts me as I am?

What if I stopped chasing perfection and started choosing peace?

Each chapter invites you into a moment of reckoning—and shows how even the darkest experiences can become the most powerful teachers.

Whether you're navigating trauma, identity, loss, or simply trying to find your voice in a noisy world, this book will meet you where you are—and help you ask better questions about where you're going.

Inside, you'll discover:

How to evolve from innocent hope to mature hope

A moving coming out story grounded in strategy and self-respect

Powerful reflections on belonging, emotional strength, and inner clarity

A roadmap for finding wholeness in a world that demands conformity

If you loved books like Untamed, Man’s Search for Meaning, or The Body Keeps the Score—but crave a narrative grounded in both personal pain and practical power—this is your next read.

You don't need to have lived the same story to feel seen by it.

For readers of:
Self-help memoirs, emotional resilience, LGBTQ nonfiction, personal transformation, authenticity, disability and identity stories, overcoming shame, self-acceptance